Zero no Tsukaima

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Chapter Five: The New School Term[]

Saito and others didn’t know what to do with so much free time before the new school term started.

Three days had passed since returning from Louise’s place. When they returned to the academy, it was basically the same daily life as usual.

“Tsk... He’s clearly a bad guy, we can’t just stand around and do nothing.”

In the hangout of the Ondine Knight Corps, Saito declared while resting his elbows on the table.

“When did you become so belligerent?”

Guiche asked as he gulped down his wine.

This was the place where noble boys used to drink recklessly after school, and if the teachers scowled at them, they would excuse it as a "training filth ." Because the Ondine Knight Corps were founded as the Queen’s guards, the teachers could not complain once training was mentioned.

“Because it’s strange. They, umm, that Gallia. It’s a really big country. If they wanted to, they could attack Louise and me, and Tabitha and her mother, but for some reason they haven’t done it.”

”They’re just that kind of people. It wouldn’t be too hard to get you in the cover of night. That’s why we need to be vigilant.”

Guiche answered nonchalantly, composing himself.

“I want to do something about Tabitha’s mother...”

“Well, it’s nice and all, but what can we do about elven medicine? We’re at a dead end.”

Not disagreeing, Saito shook his head.

“Anyhow, the fact that Gallia’s not sending an official protest is most satisfying. Isn’t it strange when war doesn’t break out when it usually should? The opponent is the king of the large country of Gallia. As said before, it’s too big for common folk like us to understand.”

Certainly, Gallia had not figured out what to say yet.

Though that silence was eerie, sometimes there were circumstances never revealed to the public.

“The king of that large country, huh...”

Saito absentmindedly looked up into the sky. As had been said – he should have been happy returning alive rather than troubled about such things.

However, he could not allow himself that.

Saito began trying to figure out a course of action. However, nothing came to his mind. It was not just Gallia’s King Joseph with high ambitions - there was a Void user like Louise in Gallia as well. And, like him, a Void familiar...

A large country with the power of Void. It was too much of an opponent.

One cannot win just by swinging a sword alone – as he painfully admitted this, Guiche tapped his shoulder.

“Anyway! It is necessary for brave men like us to rest. Wouldn’t it be a grave loss to not enjoy life? Cheers, have a drink. Wasn’t it tough for you at Louise’s home?”

“C-Cheers...”

After all, it was far more challenging at Louise’s home than in Gallia. Tired and injured, Saito slept for a long time. He had only woken up that day at noon, and found neither Louise nor Siesta around.

Without him there, those fellows cut their classes, and were indulging themselves to binge for as long as three days and three nights. Soon after he arrived, Saito joined the clamor.

“Nooo, but, I have a great question! Because we invaded Gallia, Tabitha...wasn’t she a member of Gallia’s royal family? And we helped her! As one would expect from the Commander and Sub-Commander.”

One drunk member rattled. Guiche gladly shook his head.

“What good would that have been without your cover? You lured the Dragon Knight Corps to the Germanian border. When I become a general, I’ll reward you.”

“Indeed! We might have been useful after all!”

“Not just might! Ahahaha!”

“Hey Guiiiiche! Are you talking about Tabitha?!”

“Yup.”

Guiche nodded quickly.

“Watch your big mouth!”

“W-What is it! There isn’t anything to be concerned about, right?”

Guiche mumbled, when Saito began to strangle him.

“Watch who you’re telling that to!”

“C-Calm down! I didn’t tell that to anyone else but the knight corps!”

“You’re not lying?”

“I’m not. I’m smart enough to not be so easily elated.”

“For your sake, I hope you’re not.”

While such private exchange were heating up, the fat Malicorne appeared with first year schoolgirls at his side.

“Malicorne-sama! You are so cool!”

“Please, let us hear the story again!”

They were somewhat cute girls. Malicorne was wearing a hat with big feathers for some reason, and a shirt like Guiche’s. "What’s up?" – the guys from knight corps started gathering around.

“It’s embarrassing Kaneko-chan. But I guess it cannot be helped.”

“Kiyaaaaaa! Great!”

Malicorne pointed with a finger, proud as a peacock, and the surrounding girls started to squeal from joy.

“Well, I went to Alhambra Castle, and put the commanders and their subordinates to sleep! And then the elf appeared!“

“Kiya, kiya!”

“Then I pulled out my wand fearlessly and shouted, ‘Oi, long-eared rascal! If you value your life, let the princess go! If not, then, stronger than any magic in existence, my wind spell will gush out...’ Ah, of course, Princess Tabitha. It’s that small girl."

“You are so cool! Talking down to an elf!”

“Well I have to admit, those kind of superficial guys are easy to beat. If I am serious, puff! – and they fly high. Puff.”

“Youuuuuuuu! ‘Puff’ this!”

Saito’s flying kick slammed right into Malicorne’s solar plexus.

“Gugh!”

Malicorne somersaulted down.

However, he stood up with a red face.

“Ha, Saito, because today I have this gorgeous aura around me, I’ll take it calmly. But attack again – and I will join the Dragon Knight Corps.”

“Y-You, this...you have no common sense...”

Saito’s shoulders were trembling with anger when he started beating Malicorne, "bang bang."

“Noo, be nice, hero. These girls, by all means, want to hear about your adventures. Speak up, Sub-Commander-san.”

“You are that Saito-dono?”

Girls with long hair surrounded Saito from left to right. The first year students’ eyes were sparkling like stars as they gazed at Saito. Behind them was Katie from before.

She triumphantly patted a first-year’s shoulders.

“Indeed. This person is the Sub-Commander of the Undine Knight Corps, Saito-dono. When you hear of the many adventures that Saito-dono had, it will dazzle you like a brilliant star!”

“Nooo! Great!”

The first year girls shouted joyfully. Saito gradually relaxed his serious expression.

“I-It’s too much...”

“Tell us about your adventures!”

Then, Guiche stuck his face over from the back.

“Then ask the commander. The commander...”

With a rose between his teeth, he gracefully posed.

“This guy is from the Gramont family!”

“It’s Guiche-sama! So handsome!”

Guiche trembled.

“Say that some more.”

“Eh?”

“More, repeat the words you just said.”

“H-Handsome...”

Guiche thrust out both hands and placed them in front of his face. Then, he began swirling his hair around his right finger.

“The commander of the Ondine Knight Corps of the Water Spirit, Guiche de Gramont. There is no more excellent commander of such boorish fellows than I. My, you are so cute. No, you are probably the holy woman Joanna that they draw in all religious paintings! You might be a rose after all. My goodness, if you are not the best rose!”

With increasing elaborate vocabulary, Guiche continued wooing the girl.

“Ne, Saito-dono.”

Shaking her long, straight, hazel hair, Katie drew closer.

“W-What?”

“We formed a female support group!”

“Support group?”

“Yes! It was organized between the first and second years. Ne~”

The schoolgirls around her gave cute nods.

“Doesn’t the Ondine Knight Corps have a lot of things to do? So we thought that us girls could help when necessary.”

“Help?”

At Saito’s vacant look, Katie, with some rustling, took out the basket at her side.

“Yes! We prepared some dishes for now! Please eat it during your training.”

When Katie tried to set her dish, the door opened with a loud bang, and maids jumped in from the kitchen with Siesta in front.

“Siesta!”

Siesta and her maids were holding large dishes.

“Saito-san! Despite all my worries from you sleeping so long after your return, you seem to be surprisingly energetic!”

“T-Thank you.”

One after another, Siesta’s housemaids started setting dishes on the table.

“Wait! Don’t be so selfish!”

Noble schoolgirls started complaining about the commoner maid.

However, Siesta stared back at Katie, unwavering.

“When nobles cook, our heads roll! Isn’t that right everyone?”

"That’s right, that’s right", said the maids as they nodded.

“That’s why we will take care of the meals for the Knight Corps. The Misses must work hard at studying.”

With determined face, Siesta began setting dishes on the table.

Katie got angry, took a placed dish and began eating while mumbling.

“Please do not eat that!”

“Commoner’s taste is so saucy!”

The maids and the support group turned against each other, and cat fights eventually broke out. Saito was experiencing heaven and hell at the same time.

Malicorne tried to stop the conflict.

“Please stop fighting over me!” he shouted, but was sent flying by kicks from both sides.

Then every one from the Knight Corps got involved, and chaos erupted in their hangout.

The scene was witnessed by three third-year girls from a window. They were Louise, Montmorency, and Kirche.

Montmorency watched Guiche’s attitude, furious.

“Not again! Not again! What’s with the ‘I’m your knight’ thing?! Really! Let’s settle this once and for all! Louise! Come with me!”

Shouting, she turned towards the exit. Louise didn’t move.

“What is it, Louise? You saw it too, right? Saito is being hit on not only by that maid, but also by the celebrity of the first-years - Katie, and right under your nose, too. Don’t you want to do something about it?”

Yet, Louise’s answer defied Montmorency’s expectations.

“It’s alright. Calm down.”

That sort of attitude from Louise shocked Kirche.

“It can’t be, Louise. Is there something wrong with you?”

“There’s nothing wrong. It’s pointless to get angry at this familiar every single time. So...”

Louise said with a clear face.

“He’s madly in love with me anyway. Such a bother. Or should I say trouble. So I don’t empathize much, but - my, my...those children, they don’t know that stupid dog, and fight over passing and not passing dishes. Those girls with small brains can’t see that...that stupid dog is only crazy about his Master...”

With a serious look, Kirche placed her hand against Louise’s forehead.

“No fever.”

“Louise, did you drink some weird potions lately?”

Concerned, Montmorency asked.

“I haven’t drank any. Perhaps, Montmorency, I should tell you too.”

“And what would you tell?”

“That to be a good woman, space is important. This is a part of nobility.”

“But didn’t you give up your noble status to the Princess earlier?”

Though it was calmly pointed out by Kirche, Louise shook her head and as if relieved said:

“Princess-sama is a very wonderful person after all. I was impressed to hear her thoughts. Therefore, I decided to serve loyally again.”

“Something strange must have happened between you and Her Majesty.”

Montmorency and Kirche nodded, looking at each other.

“Nothing’s strange! Anyway, the important thing, as I said, is to give the gentleman some space!”

“My, Louise, that’s your strategy? Can you handle such a strategy?”

Kirche made a dazzling smile.

“What s-strategy?! There is no strategy, I am loved and that’s all!”

Blushing, Louise denied Kirche’s words.

“Excuse me, Louise. You teach a nice thing, but do you really feel this way?”

Kirche placed an arm on Louise’s shoulder.

“Because you are such fun, let me help you with your romance too. Take it as gratitude for the whole Gallia operation. I could give it to you. If you learn the tricks of love, you could be even more attractive, right?“

“There is no need to!”

“Ah, I see. Then I won’t give it.”

After these words, Louise’s curiosity rose.

“O-Only to see how it looks.”

“Excuse me Louise, but you are asking the Ardent for adult woman’s advice? Understood?”

Advice.

That word revived a lot of failures in her mind.

Black cat suit.

Sailor uniform.

Such memories made Louise grow more and more embarrassed.

“No good. Others’ advice always fails. That’s how it usually turns out.”

“Whose advice?”

“S-Sword’s.”

“That talking sword of Saito’s? You don’t really mean to treat that iron board’s advice on the same level as veteran in romance’s - Kirche’s?”

Honesty, she did not like this woman - Kirche von Zerbst. However...she certainly had to recognize her arts and wiles in love. After all, the La Vallière lovers had been stolen away by Kirche’s clan throughout their entire lineage’s history...

Louise said in a shaky voice, still struggling to maintain her dignity:

“W-Well, since I have nothing to do, I could keep you company for a short while.”

“Great. It will be fun!”

“M-Me too – it won’t hurt to listen.”

Montmorency said with a blush on her cheeks.

“Alright then. I’ll take good care of you.”

Louise and Montmorency went into Kirche’s room. As usual, it was a very gorgeous room. There were two wardrobes by the west wall, each larger than a bed, reaching from the floor to ceiling, which had a giant mirror in between. Lacy curtains hung from the ceilings; sculptures, paintings, and various works of art were placed all over the room.

Kirche, looking very eager, sat on the bed and ordered them both:

“Alright, take them off.”

“Yes?”

Louise and Montmorency had vacant expressions.

“Take them off. Now, I’m telling you to show the Ardent what kind of undergarments you wear.”

The two pupils blushed hard and protested.

“Hey Kirche, I clearly said that I have no interest in such hobbies!”

“Me neither!”

“Neither do I, but I cannot teach you about love otherwise. I am the teacher; you are my pupils, so be completely obedient.”

“Stop joking!”

The two girls trembled with anger and shouted.

“What about you? If your lover sways in another direction, how will you stop him from swaying in that direction? Indeed, I understand Guiche and Saito’s feelings. When you are both so temperamental, it’s no wonder why they go flirt with other girls.”

“Ku...“ Montmorency and Louise clenched their fists with deep regret.

“Quickly, take off your shirt and skirt and show me what underwear you wear.”

In a determined way, Montmorency took off her shirt. Under it appeared the skinny body of Montmorency.

“Take it off!”

Seeing her like that, Louise stripped off her shirt as well.

“Skirts too.”

Hands crossed, Kirche ordered with a happy-from-the-bottom-of-her-heart voice. With a "Haaa!" shout, Louise unfastened her skirt, allowing it to pool down on the floor in a circle around her feet.

Watching back and forth from Montmorency to Louise, Kirche began commenting.

“You really are children.”

“W-W-W-Whyyy?!”

“Do you really show such underwear to your lover?”

“I don’t show it! I just wear it!”

Louise and Montmorency weren’t wearing particularly eccentric underwear. They were white and neat, but they both had similar camisoles. Though they had lacy decorations around the edges and quite detailed texture, they indeed looked childish.

“Well, you...”

“What?!”

“A woman, who doesn’t value her underwear won’t be valued by a man either.”

The two went "Ugh" and shut up.

“You bought those from shops under recommendations of coming and going merchants, didn’t you? Those people, because you are students, naturally, only chose the ones with such childish designs.“

Kirche ordered the salamander, which was lying down in the corner of a room:

“Flame, please bring us the parents’ family baggage from back then.”

"Kyuru kyuru" - while barking, the salamander dragged the old baggage from under the bed. Kirche pointed at two of them with her chin.

“Why don’t you open it?”

Louise and Montmorency looked at each other, and together opened the baggage.

“Wha-!”

“W-What’s this! Lewd! So lewd!”

Seeing the undergarments inside - they were both shocked. Then, instinctively, they covered their faces with their hands. Kirche finished, proudly swirling her hair.

“These are the ones I used to wear as a child. They should be suitable sizes for you, right?”

Though the words damaged their pride, or maybe because of that, the two girls did not reply with anything.

“Remember, underwear is a woman’s weapon. It’s the spell that captures men’s minds. Showing them gives you a mature woman’s aura.”